I bought my R9S for exactly the same reasons you have listed. My "big" guns have proven too big for me to carry regularly except in the cold weather. So I bought a NAA Guardian .380 for pocket carry. That works, but I'm not a big fan of the .380 ACP for stopping power.
Now I have the Rohrbaugh with about 160 rounds on it thus far, and ZERO problems. I will be shooting it regularly until I get 500 rounds on the gun, and then back off to a magazine or two per range session.
As for the "extreme lengths" you mention for maintenance, it's really not that different from any other autoloaders I have. The materials are a bit different from what you may have on hand, but I was able to pick up the Mobil 1 and Super Lube at the local K-Mart.
I also went to the trouble to dig out the specs of Super Lube grease and compare them to several other gun greases on the market. The Super Lube is the real deal.
Welcome to the Forum and good shooting if you choose to buy an R9S. Good shooting even if you don't buy one! The folks who correspond on this forum are very knowledgable and easy to talk with.

sslater